Looking Back

Burrr … it’s getting cold here – again. Fall is in the air. It’s back to sweatshirts and jackets. I guess it’s a good thing I didn’t bother to pack them away. I put the blankets back on the bed this morning. Now where did I put that flannel nightgown? Summer was fun – the whole two weeks. The last couple of mornings have been in the 40s with the highs around 70 or so. Even in the heat of the day, the air has a nip to it.

Still no water yet. Honey and his Dad pulled the pump yesterday and found that the motor had burnt up. It could be because the water level got so low that it was trying to suck up sand and dirt, or it could be because the electric surges and outages have finally fried it. That wouldn’t be the first electrical gadget the surges/outages have destroyed. They are hopefully going to have the motor/pump replaced this weekend and we can continue to limp along until the well drillers can get here. Just one more of life’s little challenges.

Awhile back, Tom (over at Christian Farm and Ranchman)wrote a post that has really stuck with me. Actually, to be completely honest, it has nagged at me. It was referenced with the Scripture,

“No man, having put his hand to the plough, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God.” – Luke 9:62

As a farmer, he made some good points about how when plowing a field a farmer must keep his focus on what’s ahead, with only an occasional look back; or else he will stray from the course. I had read that particular Scripture many times, but never really understood it. Now it makes sense. Despite my personal longing, I’m not a farmer but the Lord has been showing me how that same lesson applies to me specifically.

Being 40-something, it’s been a long time since I was a kid in school. Actually I often have days where remembering back that far is difficult. So many years have gone by, so much water under the bridge so to speak. Anyone over the age of about two knows that each year brings challenges, adventures, and changes. Sometimes these changes are intentional; sometimes they just happen when we’re not paying attention. Hopefully the result of the change is for the better. I don’t seem to notice the change unless someone points it out or until I run into an old friend or acquaintance.

I’ve recently reconnected with some old friends from high school. Granted, I was far from sainthood back then. Let’s just say that God was working on my conscience, but He hadn’t quiet gotten through to me yet. As life went on and God became real to me, I have changed pretty dramatically. In getting re-acquainted with these folks, I’ve seen more and more how my thinking and priorities have changed.

OK, now for a little pop quiz: When you run into someone from your less than saintly past, do you boldly proclaim your faith and “new personality”, or do you try to just ‘ease’ into the revelation? When the words come to your mouth, do you suddenly clamp your lips shut and have even the slightest hesitation before you proclaim your faith?

Please don’t tell me that it’s just me. I’m bearing my sinful soul here. I am happy to say that the hesitation was only a split second (or two) and then the face of Jesus came to mind. How can I possibly deny my dear Lord? The memory of the cross is so vivid. He paid such a precious price for me. Shame at my hesitation and then joy over yet one more opportunity to proclaim my Jesus!

The Scripture have been proven true for me yet once again. In looking back for more than a glance, I would loose focus on the calling God has on my life. I would eventually be rendered completely ineffective for the Lord. As a self-conscious child, I did things that I knew were wrong just to fit in. I didn’t want to stand out as peculiar. I hid my very ‘weak’ faith for social acceptance. By the grace of God, I’m no longer that girl. In giving my whole life to Him, I have become a new person singing a new song!

This body is no longer able to wear stylish clothes and turn heads – and frankly, I’m thankful. If it were, the temptation to fall back into that old life would be awful strong. Baring the aches and pains of old age, I am grateful to God for the changes in my life (and body).

Well the lights are flickering again. Keep us in your prayers please. It’s electric companies like ours that make terrorists out of ordinarily good, God-fearing people. (government people who monitor the internet, I was just kidding!)

Have a great day, and may the Lord bless you.

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